Did you ever wonder how is it with so MANY LIKES & COMMENTS on your insta posts that you still feel the sense of LONELINESS? Could it be that those likes don't equate to connection? Could it mean that the comments don't equate to authentic conversation?
Did you know that it is HUMAN NATURE to CRAVE CONNECTION?
Social media can't create that authentic connection that we crave, although it can give us a moment of validation. Now this is not to say that social media is a horrible and evil thing that we need to get rid of. However, what I am saying that it is something that we need to become more MINDFUL of the effects that it has on us on a daily basis. Social media can easily ALTER moods, behavior and even give us a FALSE perception of what life looks like. I know that I have personally had to take measures on how long I look at social media and what accounts I follow. My mind is very aware that social media doesn't often equate to reality, but that doesn't mean my feelings always line up to that truth when I scroll for hours. There is UNDOUBTEDLY a negative effect on our mood and behavior when looking through social media.
So how do we fix this? Or how do we at least not allow it to alter us?
BREATHE: I can feel the nervousness go up and the sweat start to drip, so let me get this out of the way...I AM NOT SAYING you have to git rid of it. Some of you may feel that is the measure to take, and I have had seasons of life of getting rid of it. I also know that getting rid of social media can heighten the anxiety and worsen the mood in some of us, so that isn't the only solution. So what I am suggesting is the following:
I encourage us to find someone this week to HAVE LUNCH with, instead of just liking their post or leaving a comment. Lunch (or coffee for those broke college students/which I vividly remember being) with a friend (new or old) will not only make us feel better, but will create a stronger and more real connection.
I encourage us to MONITOR our time on instagram and snapchat, and see if that makes a difference. Since most of spend an average of 4hrs a day (and that is being very generous), we tend to get a little down and fight off feelings of loneliness and work through the lies of not being good enough. So if we were take 1/2 of the time that spend on social media and do something else that we enjoy (like working out, hanging out, or vegging out) then I bet we would notice a change in our mood, behavior and even our perspective.
I encourage us to POST more AUTHENTIC and HONEST posts (not saying you need to be super vulnerable, because the world doesn't need to know all your junk). We tend to put up only our highlights, when in reality we deal with more of the lowlights and bloopers in our life. I think if we were to be more authentic and honest in our posts not only would we feel more empowered but it would empower others to be authentic and create a better sense of connection. People can connect to authentic way easier then they can connect to a false perception.
So ladies lets not allow social media to lead us to believe that we are alone, we aren't good enough, and we aren't wanted. Let's make social media a launching pad into authentic conversations, friendships, connections.
Until Next Time
Anastasia Brokas